Tuesday 23 October 2007

LISTEN TO WHAT YOU SAY TO YOURSELF!

If you listen to what you say to yourself, you'll be surprised what you hear

http://adjustthebalance.org.uk/cms/images/stories/5301_health_booklet_3.pdf

Einstein said

“We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.”


Some thought on planning http://adjustthebalance.org.uk/cms/images/stories/5442%20Top%20Tips%20Planning%20V2.pdf

Friday 19 October 2007

They say 'I feel like I have no friends!'

That word 'feel' again. I know where they are at though. We are often all guilty of 'imagineering' situations. Some also call it 'awfulising'. It really means losing or creating a false perception. This can happen when we are tired and depressed. Often results in worrying. I found this helpful(don't know the source though)
Of 100% of worries
40% Simply never happened
30% Past events - totally out of our control
12% Your health - or a 'dis-eased' imagination
10% Family qualms that are groundless
8% Worries that have a basis in conditions that can be treated.

Yourself can always be your first 'friend' !However, it is also possible to be that focused that we don't appear to need friends.

It is intersesting to examine what evidence we use to create our perceptions.There is a tension between our self-image and the image others have of us. Which do we use as our point of reaction.How many friends are required to overcome 'loneliness' ? Do we often seek company because we don't like being alone with ourselves(Does this mean we need to value ourselves more !)Does it also mean that when we meet people we demand 'positive' feedback ?

Friends often exist for 'seasons'. Some stay around, some leave, and others arrive. That doesn't mean that you are the reason for it.

Thursday 18 October 2007

Tuesday 16 October 2007

Developing Tolerance.

You may find yourself in conflict with colleagues. Try the following :-

Set up a shared journal. (A permanent, open record that can easily be duplicated)
Contributions can be made by all parties.
The 'manager' can then a set times evaluate comments with 'colleagues' to seek solutions/or responses.
Hopefully, after a while both yourself & your colleagues will feel more tolerent, in control and empowered to make positive changes

See you later fellow travellers !

REGAINING CONTROL

Communicate how you feel under the following headings (It may help to write it down or get someone to listen and write it for you):-
(a)Physical
(b)Mental
(c)Emotional
(d)Volitional(being able to choose)
(e)Social/relational
(f)Spiritual(if applicable)
You may wish to just put the words 'Responsive' or 'Reactive' next to each.(Trust the language you use, it will indicate what possible struggles are. i.e. 'I feel out of control' Shows is reactive - emotional/volitional)Then starting with (a) set a target for the next month. i.e. My first target was to take medicine regularly.

Review targets each month. Try not to change too many things at once. It is possible that reducing (d)& (e) May also give more control and allow boundaries to be re-established.

You need to learn to recognise the impact each change is having.(If it de-stabilises, move back a bit. You may also see reaction in in other areas. i.e. a mental change may have emotional/physical consequences).

Be gentle and safe in your changes. Work towards being responsive rather than reactive.

If others are aware of your 'targets' then they should be able to respond appropriately and remind of previous successes. Is there anybody else that could 'support' you at this time ?(if you are a carer and person isn't up to the above, then 'supportively' share targets with them, making sure they feel 'physically' safe first !)

Monday 15 October 2007

A useful overview from the TUC

I must admit I had to be reminded I already had this link.

http://www.tuc.org.uk/h_and_s/tuc-5771-f0.cfm

It is useful also to see the Canadian view see post for

http://edukayted.blogspot.com/2007/08/canada-is-in-lead.html


Many thanks to those contributing links !

Sunday 14 October 2007

To stop those bullys with dignity !

These have some excellent links

http://dignityatworknow.org.uk/

and
SORRY UNAVAILABLE AT PRESENT
http://www.bullyonline.org/

Expressing your work concerns

Try jotting down how you feel. You'll be surprised how the language you use gives a clue to the situation you are in and its solution.

To help the following may be handy.
'I am concerned about ...............

Culture - Change - Control
Organisation
Needs - (personal)
Communication - Relationships
Environment
Role
Nurture - Training/Support
Experience
Demands

(Keywords for H&SE -Management Standards for Work-related Stress
http://www.hse.gov.uk/stress/standards/downloads.htm)

Tuesday 9 October 2007

COULD THIS BE OF HELP TO YOU ?

Need some support
http://mhsupp0rt.proboards98.com/

Thanks to all those passing on good links.

Monday 8 October 2007

A breathe of fresh air in Scotland

Try this out and its free ! Help is finally getting through !

http://www.livinglifetothefull.com/index.php